New Narratives : ‘Leading the way because It Socks to be Lonely Sometimes’

Through ‘New Narratives, we’ll explore the multi-faceted nature of loneliness by sharing insights and stories from as many perspectives as possible, not only to help bridge the gap between isolation and connection but to also enrich our community’s understanding of loneliness.

Today’s narrative has been written by Janice Moth, Founder of Glamour Club events, and Managing Director of It Socks to be Lonely Sometimes that connects change-makers in the business community with those who want to make a positive social health impact.

Janice’s original article in Edge Magazine for The Institute of Leadership’s awards.

This is an extended piece for the Tackling Loneliness Hub. In 2024, Janice was a finalist in the The Institute of Leadership’s prestigious awards (voted by 55,000 members) and was asked to write the following piece on building health volunteer cultures for their winter edition of their Edge magazine.

From Lonely Moments to a Mission:

Building a health a health volunteer culture is a process that does not happen overnight – it requires dedication and ongoing improvement. Sitting in Kuala Lumpur Airport in 2017, on my way home from a ten-month trip around Southeast Asia, I reflected on my fantastic trip, but it dawned on me that I had been chronically lonely.

As humans, we are a social species. However, even surrounded by people, we can easily feel lonely and slow to ask for help because of the stigma surrounding loneliness. When I looked at the statistics, I discovered that I wasn’t alone in feeling lonely. Millions of people across the world experience loneliness every day. It is detrimental to their mental and physical health, as well as their emotional wellbeing. It crushes the soul and, as researchers are discovering, it does far more damage than that.

Sat in that distant airport, I decided to do something to help end loneliness when I got back to the UK. My mission began by setting up It Socks to be Lonely Sometimes Ltd, a companion service designed for everybody.

The name came from a story from my son Jannick, who is a contemporary dancer. He described a piece of art on a wall in Brooklyn. Someone had stuck one lonely, colourful sock on the wall, and as people in the local community heard about it, they added their own lost and lonely colourful socks. Soon, the wall became a spectacular piece of art filled with meaning and colour.

Jannick was inspired by the wall and performed a dance with a single sock in a converted biscuit factory in London famous for inventing the bourbon, garibaldi and digestive biscuits, it was called “It Socks to be Lonely Sometimes”.

A great night out during the day

The Glamour Club events were born out of this. Launched during Mental Health Awareness Week in 2018, I wanted the events to be inclusive, affordable and quintessentially British, to be held in a beautiful venue – high quality and easily accessible via public transport. I saw it as a prescription to cure loneliness – a ‘Great Night Out During the Day’ with sophisticated live entertainment, beautifully laid tables, porcelain crockery, traditional sandwiches and cakes – with exemplary customer service and everyone (and everything) would be dressed to each them -run entirely by volunteers.

Attendees of one of the many glamorous events held.

In six years, we have held 30 ‘flagship’ events where 1770+ guests have been served by 450 volunteers, three concept commissions including a high-quality virtual event during lockdown, Grand Finale of Worthing Mental Health Awareness week directly after and on Brighton Palace Pier for loneliness awareness week 2023 in collaboration with TogetherCo Brighton’s loneliness charity. Which saw 160 of us promenading and connecting on one of the world’s most famous tourist attractions.

There are many ways to build connections that bind us together in our communities. I discovered you don’t have to be high-tech or expensive to end loneliness. It’s about getting people together on a regular basis and allowing them to build deeper connections.

We empower people to help end their own loneliness and to gain a greater understanding of each other while they do it. Everyone is welcome – we are dementia friends, intergenerational, disability confident and eco-friendly. We ensure that the events are psychologically and physically safe and welcoming. One aim is to ensure everyone there feels thoroughly spoiled, empowered, included and genuinely valued and cared for.

A positive volunteer culture is not just best practice

Our desire to live and breathe our values shape our volunteer experience. This includes how we communicate and address difficulties, and oversee how volunteers interact with one another. We don’t hold back telling the truth, we listen to what our volunteers tell us, and we take immediate action when necessary to manage issues as they arise. Between us, we have a lot of skills and knowledge and put everything we learn into a continuous and lifelong evolution. The fabulous thing about this continuous movement is that each event is sprinkled with the uniqueness of the people within it.

Each time we think we can’t get any better, the next one is always The Best One Yet!

Our core team includes 35 people, who invite their friends and families to join. In turn, they become guests, supporters and volunteers. We laid the foundation for the events as we want the organisation to survive and thrive. Built on strong leadership, our mission is clear, and we have common values, which are well communicated. We provide a welcoming, physically and psychologically safe space, designed to empower everyone. The organisation is open and transparent, with regular meetings in between our events. We have person-centred volunteer programmes and volunteers receive as much guidance and resources as they need.

Each event starts with an opening ceremony, where all volunteers are invited to the stage for a massive round of applause from our guests and our team. Afterwards, a media post goes out followed by another thank you a week or so later, to highlight some of the stand out moments. We are determined to be really different. We are an oasis in a desert. This is why our volunteer retention is high.

The author Janice and a Glamour Club event attendee, toasting the evening.

Volunteers come and go as their personal circumstances change. When they leave, it’s not the end of the relationship. We keep in touch with those who want to keep in touch with us. This turnover means we recruit new volunteers for each event, adding to the team as we go. We are open and transparent from the outset because it’s important to manage expectations on each side. I am really aware of volunteering burn out and actively oversee to make sure that the tasks aren’t disproportional. Sharing how their efforts are impacting The Glamour Club events is really important so that they don’t lose sight of the mission. We actively promote a spirit of camaraderie which boosts longevity.

Growing and cultivating a positive volunteer culture is not just best practice, it’s the cornerstone of a healthy and successful volunteer programme. By understanding why this is important, you can identify the warning signs of a toxic culture and turn it around. Remember, building a healthy volunteer culture is an ongoing process that does not happen overnight. Rather, it requires dedication and ongoing improvement. If your organisation makes a commitment to fostering a healthy culture of volunteerism, then the result will be positive and sustainable and will empower your volunteers, your organisation, and your community.

As a leader, my top priority is nurturing all of our stakeholder relationships and I make sure our volunteers are recognised for their compassion, activism and participation. I have a strong personal commitment to support volunteer engagement efforts, as we strive to compassionately meet community needs. It’s their generosity and philanthropy that inspires me to be a good leader, whilst meeting the organisations’ needs.

About the Author

Aside from the Glamour Club events, Janice is managing director of It Socks to be Lonely Sometimes, she connects with change-makers in the business community who want to make a positive social health impact.

She is regularly asked into local, regional and national organisations, including NHS mental health trusts, as a guest speaker to talk about loneliness and how it affects organisational culture, well-being and engagement.

Janice is involved in several projects locally, regionally and internationally with a particular focus on improving mental, social, physical and emotional health. She has invested in her own development and gained a postgraduate degree in Social Health Innovation and Change Initiatives – Positive Power Influence, from Harvard Business School. She is also a member of the Institute of Leadership (fellowship enduring).

Janice can be contacted on the hub or by emailing: info@theglamourclub.co.uk/a> or connect with Janice on LinkedIn

The Glamour Club events:www.theglamourclub.co.uk/corporate
The Institute of Leadership:https://leadership.global/
Photo credits by https: www.markdaviesphotography.com

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